A salesman knocks at the door and a young boy answers. The little boy says, "Please be quiet, sir. My mother is a pr*stitute and works all night. She sleeps during the day." The salesman scratches his head and says, "Well, I'll be a son of a b*tch" The little boy replies, "I'm a bast*rd myself, but I don't go around ringing people's doorbells and
telling them about it."

One Friday afternoon, two secretaries were hanging around the water cooler at the office. "Veronica, I just don't know what to do," Gloria said to her friend at work. "That good-looking Alex in accounting asked me out on a date for Saturday night. Should I go?" "Oh, my God!"
her friend exclaimed. "He'll wine you, dine you, and then use any ruse to get you up to his apartment. Then he'll rip off your dress and you'll have fantastic s*x!" "What should I do?" asked Gloria. Her friend quickly replied, "Wear an old dress."

Till next time, keep LOLling.